It’s almost 2am and I’m wired. Significant physiological and psychological factors are driving this insomnia.

Some context first. I’m in my hometown of T.Bay, in bed – a hotel room in the dark. Wife is sleeping next to me, I’m on my kindle fire awkwardly trying to silently hunt and peck type on this shitty little e-keyboard.

We’re up here to buy a home. Another milestone in our project to move from Massachusetts to Ontario.

That is not why I’m wired though. THC withdrawal appears to be in full effect. I’m taking another cannabis break, and that first week after quitting makes for a restless detoxing brain full of neurotransmitter. Supercharged with glutamate.

I also just played about two hours of blitz chess and am in a jangled competitive aftermath state. If I ever need to survive A Nightmare on Elm Street situation, I could probably stay up forever playing 5 minute blitz chess. I’m not even that good at it, its just addictive as shit.

Now the emotional reasons…….. Is anyone else feeling quiet desperation in the people you care about? Don’t people seem more fragile lately? This might be the first time in my life that I’ve felt like humanity is backsliding, and it is very troubling.

I think I can sleep now, suddenly I feel exhausted. Looks like the cure to insomnia is existential dread.