I’m riding my bike again (yes the pedal kind, not the motor kind) and I don’t wear a helmet. I stubbornly refuse to. If I’m destined to die from a horrible bike related concussion than so be it. A little egg shell helmet isn’t going to save me. Merle gets very upset about this. Justifiably, I suppose. Still, she won’t let the issue die and it is one of our many regular fight topics. She doesn’t accept the reason I gave at the top of this post, so out of boredom I tend to come up with other less convincing arguments like, “they look dorky”, “It will mess up my beautiful hair” or, “the strap will give me chin rash”. The last time we talked on the phone I told her that when riding to work I dress all in black because I’m a bike ninja. And bike ninjas don’t wear helmets. We’re silent and swift and don’t obey traffic laws. And for purposes of stealth I was thinking of taking off all the reflectors. I’m rarely such a sarcastic ass but during times of high stress she can draw it out of me. The results were predictable and I felt bad after.
She’s coming for a week long visit on the 16th. I don’t even get to breathe after my last exam on the 15th before she pounces. I know I’m going to be turning down another marriage proposal that week. I no longer have the school excuse. I wish I had stronger friendship bonds. Maybe I’d be able to take the leap I’m tempted to if I had a cat for moral support.
She’s a resident alien and was denied U.S. citizenship last week. She let her green card lapse too. Soon she won’t be able to come into Canada for an indeterminate amount of time. Maybe Vancouver’s the place to be. My talented little sister is out there too. She’s going to an art school. I have a feeling she’s living a bohemian lifestyle.
A guard at my workplace called in sick tonight so I’m covering. I feel like a dark little troll. When the weather starts to get better it makes working night shifts incredibly unbearable. There was a time when I used to revel in the sun. Out in it all day long, everyday. Maybe if I got more sunshine I wouldn’t write bitter little posts like this at 4:30am
The Ancient Undergrad 
Bike ninja! Too cool! I live in a town where cycling is a big deal. There’s always people out on their skinny little contraptions, sleek in their lycra or nylon, and then this big hunk of plastic on their heads. They have a bicycle race called the Little 500 here every year (it’s in one week, actually). Huh.. why am I mentioning this…. can’t remember….Vancouver’s nice. I think you’d like it. Hey, I voted for Vancouver before, didn’t I?!
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Wear your helmet. You are smarter than that. If you were on a motorcycle, I’d see your point…but a not to when you ride your bike? This lecture brought to you by wife of: bicycle-riding-helmet-wearing-architect. No e-props for you! Nyah.
Also, thanks for the well-wishes.
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chin rash? That’s believable. If she fell for that one… wow. Why does she let you torment her? I appreciate dark bitter little posts, as long as they are combined with sardonic humor. Actually agree with you about the “fated to die a horrible death” idea. I hope to die in a single car accident in the next few years, so I practice unsafe driving techniques.
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Bike ninja….sweet!
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Wow. I really hate this post. The first paragraph in particular. As always, there is a lot more to the story. Our fighting was less about a bike helmet and more a symptom of dysfunctional communication. I guess I just felt the need to highlight the most negative thing that happened to me the other day.
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really? i thought it was pretty self explanatory. especially compared to some of my other recent posts.and dude, i think we got that your fighting wasnt just about bike helmets. we’re not completely brain dead.i willl send you a cat if you would like.Vancouver is fantastic. thats’s where my family is from and i go up there all the time. totally awesome place for whatever you’re into: partying, art, metropolitain lifestyle, nature, anything. i absolutely love it and someday i will live there as well. and then i will come visit you and your wife who you will still be arguing with over bike helmets.today i am wearing a white t-shirt that says “The Best Girls Are Canadian”
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Bike Ninja!? Hahahahahahahaha that’s great!!!!
It’s pretty hard these days to become a US citizen. It took my mom (a French-born) almost a year, and she’s been living in the US with a green card for over 25 years! She just got naturalized about a year ago.
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You know…I only got to the part about the bike helmet and started my lecture. I don’t read the posts closely enough. I missed all the clever stuff. See what I get for trying to tell people what to do?
You DO get e-props for bike ninja, chin rash, and dark little troll.
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dude security guards and night time… scary stuff, you might see a ghost
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helmeteers… they drive me crazy.. I wear a helmet if I am in the mountains, because I am reckless and love wrecking by taking a dirt hill to quickly… the rolls that come out of it make me feel invincible… probably because I have up until this point, been able to get back on and keep riding. :-\ Whatever, but those crazy people that have to have their helmet for riding around in the neighborhood disgust me… what’s the point? Really? Why are you doing it, exercise? That’s such crap. ANYWAYS…there’s my rant for the day…
You speak of Merle as if she is the enemy of your destiny. How crazy is that? I was married to my Merle, and I loved the guy, I really did, and probably still do, but the reality is, I was forever changed into a weakling I never wanted to be. The coward’s road that I chose left me saint and sinner and wholly with a soul. You have to be strong, and be honest, and cleave the relationship entirely. Disfigurement of heart is not for you, I really like the way it looks now.
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