Jittery. Nervous. Fickle. Compulsive. During this past week I’ve been procrastinating into a familiar state of manic self-loathing. I hate it, I feel artificial and churn with worry inside. Over indulging in shallow temporary pleasures such as video games, novels, televised sports, excessive xanganess, junk food, etc. I need to find a way to break out of the spiral. Summon a shred of desperately needed self discipline.

I listened to a Radio Netherlands program on castrati tonight. Some nut suggested that for a serious revival of opera to take place we need to bring them back. The historical sexuality and societal discussion segments were gripping.

Of the top 100 grossing films of 2004, I watched 17. Here they are in order of largest to smallest gross. (Garfield is the stand-out horrible movie of the bunch). Here is the list. It was an oddly enlightening mundane little exercise.

1    Shrek 2
2    Spider-Man 2
4    The Incredibles
5    Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
14    50 First Dates
16    Fahrenheit 9/11
18    DodgeBall: A True Underdog Story
26    Mean Girls
27    Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
33    The Terminal
34    Garfield: The Movie
41    Kill Bill Vol. 2
43    Barbershop 2: Back in Business
48    Dawn of the Dead
63    Napoleon Dynamite
75    Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
90    Jersey Girl